I Wasn’t Lazy, I Had ADHD: My Diagnosis Journey

For most of my life, I thought something was wrong with me—but not in a way anyone could really name. Teachers called me “bright but unfocused.” Bosses said I had potential, if only I’d apply myself. And me? I just felt like a constant letdown.

Messy rooms, half-finished projects, always losing things, forgetting appointments, saying the wrong thing at the wrong time—and then lying awake at night replaying it all. The cycle felt never-ending. And the worst part? I believed the labels people gave me.

Lazy. Disorganized. Flaky. Too sensitive.

I believed them… until I learned the truth.

The Wake-Up Call

It wasn’t one big moment. It was the hundredth little one. The emotional exhaustion. The way I could hyperfocus on something for hours, then forget to eat. The way one email could derail my whole day. The clutter I couldn’t seem to “just clean.” The shame that wrapped around it all like a weighted blanket.

And then I saw a video. Just a random ADHD post on social media. Someone describing what it was like to live with ADHD as an adult. Their words hit me like a gut punch—because they weren’t just describing symptoms.

They were describing me.

Down the Rabbit Hole

I spent the next few days reading articles, watching interviews, and quietly sobbing at my desk. Not because I was sad—but because I finally saw myself through a different lens.

What if I wasn’t broken?What if I wasn’t lazy, selfish, or scatterbrained?What if my brain was just wired differently?

Eventually, I booked an appointment. I sat through evaluations. I answered pages of questions. I felt vulnerable and awkward—but also incredibly brave. And when the diagnosis came back as ADHD (combined type), I cried.

Not because I was ashamed. But because I was relieved.

Rewriting the Narrative

ADHD isn’t an excuse. It’s an explanation. It gave me language for things I couldn’t explain before:

• Why I could remember obscure facts from 10 years ago but forget my coffee in the microwave.

• Why I struggled with transitions and routine tasks—but could brainstorm creative ideas for hours.

• Why I felt everything so deeply and reacted so quickly.

• Why I was exhausted from masking and constantly trying to “keep up.”

Getting diagnosed didn’t change everything overnight, but it did change how I saw myself. I started reading books by experts who got it. I started talking to friends and family about what I’d learned. I even started treating myself with more compassion—something I’d never really done before.

What’s Changed Since

Here’s what life looks like now:

• More grace. I no longer beat myself up for struggling with things that are genuinely hard for me.

• Better tools. I use visual reminders, alarms, checklists, and systems that work for my brain, not against it.

• Support. Whether through coaching, therapy, or just honest conversations, I’ve stopped trying to do it all alone.

• Understanding. I now advocate for myself. I ask for what I need. I no longer apologize for being “too much.”

To Anyone Wondering…

If this story sounds familiar, you’re not alone. So many of us grew up undiagnosed—especially women, especially those who learned to mask. We weren’t lazy. We weren’t defective. We were doing our best with what we knew.

ADHD is real. It’s valid. And getting diagnosed is not giving up—it’s taking your power back.

So if you’re on this journey, or just starting to question whether it’s not just you, here’s my message:

You’re not broken. Your brain is just brilliant in its own way.You deserve understanding. You deserve support.You deserve to see yourself through eyes that finally get it.

Have you been diagnosed with ADHD as an adult? Or are you still in the “maybe?” phase? I’d love to hear your story. Drop a comment and let’s keep this conversation going—because we don’t have to navigate this alone.